Swiss German problems

I've talked a bit on this blog about how challenging I find Swiss German, which is basically an oral language with no written rules. But even that definition is an oversimplification. Swiss German is actually a language group - but even that term can't be properly defined due to the wide variation in the local dialects.

That's right - Swiss German doesn't actually exist, technically speaking. As Wikipedia puts it, "Linguistically, Swiss German forms no unity." You're telling me.

It truly fascinates me that such a small country with only 8 million residents already has four official languages, but even that doesn't begin to cover the breadth of linguistic variation. I'm not a linguist, nor have I been around Swiss German enough to try to explain any of the differences, but if you want to know more, the above article makes for interesting reading (even if I don't know the difference between Low, High, and Highest Alemannic).

As a demonstration of the mind-boggling variation, I present this video that a friend posted on facebook. Zurich, as you may know, is located in north central Switzerland, while Valais (German: Wallis) is a canton in the southwest and is bilingual - the western part speaks French, which the eastern speaks German. The two areas are separated by well under 200 km/125 miles (Zurich to Zermatt is 161 km/100 miles).

I mean, seriously - Ausländers don't even stand a chance, do we?

(Also note: I'm not fluent in any of these languages other than English, but I will say that I've never heard anyone say "Guten Tag" - in any accent - as "hello" in Switzerland. They say "Grüezi." The point of the video is to show different accents, I suppose, but just sayin'). UPDATE: A Swiss friend informs me that Guten Tag is used in Switzerland for some informal situations. Apparently I have never been in an informal situation in Swiss German (true dat, I have not).

French, German and language adventures

People - both at home and here in Zurich - often like to ask me how my German is coming along. Usually I wince and make "well..." into three syllables, then change the subject.

I did study a foreign language prior to moving here. I spent years in high school and college studying French. I even lived in Strasbourg for eight months as an English teaching assistant back in 2005. The local dialect in Alsace-Lorraine, of which Strasbourg is the capital, is actually a German dialect (historically, the area has been traded back and forth between Germany and France several times) - I like to think of this as the universe giving me a big ol' unsubtle hint that I chose to roundly ignore. I picked up several useful random German words, such as Geschlossen ("closed"), Verboten ("forbidden"), and Flammekuchen (a delicious food). Unfortunately, even 8 months in Strasbourg wasn't enough to catapult me to fluency in French. I can read it comfortably, but I've always needed a 30-second delay while listening and speaking in order to understand - fine when watching television, perhaps, but rather awkward in actual conversation ("Uh, well - just wait, I'll get it, mmhmm, ok, almost - yep, now I understand but I have to craft my reply, gimme a bit more time. Oh, look, you've already switched to English.")

Because of my previous experience, I like to tell people that I'm just not a language person. They all have so many rules and pesky grammar! It's confusing - the genders, the multiple ways to say "you," the prepositions that don't translate. My brain starts to hurt, then throws a tantrum and reaches boiling point rather quickly.

Also helping, of course, is that people in Zurich don't speak standard German - they speak Swiss German, a language with almost as many accents as there are Swiss citizens. So I constantly feel like I'm being asked to traverse a river made of molasses, but the boat's leaking and I was never given any oars.

Over the past month, however, strange things have started to happen:

* Two weeks ago, I received a wrong phone call from someone in Geneva and was able to communicate with them in French that I did not know the person, although the phone number they had was correct. (Phone calls are THE WORST - I don't even like them in English.)

* Last week, the Hausfrau (housekeeper-type person) at the American Women's Club, who doesn't speak English, somehow found out that I (supposedly) speak French, and it turns out that she was born in Suisse Romande (French-speaking Switzerland). After a year of awkwardly greeting her and then crab-walking for the nearest door, I was suddenly able to have a short conversation with her about how she moved to Zurich twenty-odd years ago and doesn't have many opportunities to speak French. Did I screw up some of the grammar? Totally - I used the wrong past tense to say that I lived in Strasbourg nine years ago and possibly answered things with Genau or Ja (both German) instead of French. But I was pleasantly surprised to find that I could follow her conversation and even respond before a socially-inappropriate amount of time had passed (just barely).

* I went to the train station to buy a yearly pass for Zurich public transport and managed to get through the transaction without the cashier switching into English. I didn't understand everything - I tried to show her my Halb-tax Abonnement, which she didn't need to see - she mentioned it, I just assumed she needed to see it. It helped that she spoke standard German and the pass comes in the form of a Plastikkarte, but I know that the people who work those windows always speak English and are usually willing to switch at the smallest provocation.

* In my English course, I could tell that my Swiss students were talking about a bike that had broken ("bike" in Swiss German is conveniently velo, borrowed from French). Don't misunderstand - I understood none of the details or how the story was resolved, but at least I got the subject area.

* I went shopping last week and understood when the lady told me I needed another card if I wanted to buy the dress (I did).

* I went into another store last week and managed to ask if nine articles of clothing was too many for the fitting rooms (surprisingly, it wasn't - apparently Mango has no problems with customers carrying the entire store into their fitting rooms).

These are all small victories, and I'm leaving out the failures, such as the lady who tried to tell me three times that I could only try on five things before switching to English in exasperation or the man at the grocery store who made a joke about...well, I have no idea what it was about, frankly (but yes, I laughed anyway - and then ran out of there as quickly as possible. The problem with smiling and nodding is that at some point, people realize you don't know what's going on. That's when things get real awkward).

I'd like to think that a magic switch in my brain has been activated and now the heavens will open and I will become magically fluent in both French and German. That would be kick-ass (and also unlikely - my 3 months of German never moved past the simple present and past tenses). Instead, I think the explanation is much simpler - I''m becoming more immune to "language embarrassment" (not an official thing? It should be). Rather than be paralyzed by dative vs. accusative cases, I just throw the words together to the best of my ability and hope I can be understood. My English students make mistakes all the time, but 80% of the time I still understand them (the other 20% is when it gets interesting). So I figure - why not me? I can at least try, and if I go down in flames, well - I can just write about it here :)

I've even been considering the crazy idea that I might be ready to call a restaurant to make dinner reservations auf Deutsch. But I'm pretty sure B promised in our wedding vows - or at least Swiss moving agreement - to make all the phone calls, so no rush on that.

What's the best way you've found to practice a new language or get over fears about speaking one?

Neighbors in a strange land

I've tipped over the edge of seven months here in Zurich, and time seems to be accelerating. Signs have gone up about school starting again (Schulanfang: Achtung Kinder!), and the air has a wonderful crispness to it. Slowly but surely, summer is starting to dwindle.

Two weeks ago, B and I missed out our somewhat regular weekend trip to Basel to see his family because a sign had gone up in our apartment entryway. I couldn't understand the details, but the general drift was - "Come and be with the neighbors! Bring your own drinks and food to grill." I insisted we go - non-optional. I was both terrified and relieved at the prospect of finally meeting the people that I'd spent months studiously avoiding. B is usually up and out before the building stirs, but I've spent my time scurrying between our apartment door and the street like a dog who was trying to sneak a chicken bone out of the trash before his owners notice it's missing. I lived in fear of running into someone in the hallway, the front stoop, or - worst of all - the washküche (laundry room), which has only one door and no escape route.

Since we moved in May, we'd met a sum total of one neighbor: a woman with two small children who lives next to us, and once brought us some left over birthday cake. She wowed my in-laws by speaking to them in flawless (Castilian) Spanish, then turned to me and switched to completely fluent, thinly accented English. She turned out to be German, and when she inquired whether I spoke Spanish as well, I said no - I caught words only occasionally, usually ones that overlapped with either English or French. She laughed and said knowingly, "Oh, that's how I am with Russian." It took all the willpower I had to appear as a mature adult and not blurt out, "Good lord, woman, how many languages do you SPEAK?" I felt very American.

Anyway - back to the neighborly gathering. I insisted we go, so on Saturday morning at the supermarket I made sure to grab some sausages for the grill. I also baked two batches of these chocolate chip cookies - as a sort of peace offering for not speaking their language (I didn't have any plum puffs). There were easily 15 people already at the playground (we were almost 15 minutes late - shockingly long in Swiss time), and only 3 of them appeared to speak English (well - were comfortable speaking English, which is probably different). Either most of our neighbors are retired Swiss people, or that's just the type of people that come to these types of gatherings.

No lie, it was awkward as all hell, at least at first. I was a nervous wreck and spent most of the time smiling nervously and wringing my hands in my lap. Luckily, the neighbor lady we'd met was there with her children, so she introduced us initially. I'd read about the Swiss custom of individually introducing oneself to everybody, but I had no idea it was so true. I trailed B around the table, shaking hands and trying to parrot back names - my success rate was probably around 25% - not great. We did finally learn the Hausfrau's name (thank god! I had been hiding from her most especially), and according to B, she's actually pretty funny (contrary to her rather severe, dour appearance). As is often the case when B and I go places, it took a while for there to be an understanding that although I'm the ignorant America, B does in fact speak German (a misunderstanding that is likely due to the fact that we speak English to each other, and his accent is probably not noticeable to a non-native speaker). Everybody was very understanding that I'd been here only six months - although I worry what the time frame is for when they will have greater expectations of my language prowess.

I did get more comfortable throughout the evening. I enjoyed listening to the conversations and trying to pick out words - I even managed to pick out some differences between Hochdeutsch and Schweizerdeutsch. By the end, I was feeling comfortable enough that I ventured a few German sentences, although they were grammatically mangled to various degrees. I managed to get out one fully correct sentence, even getting the prepositional phrase in the right place: Ich bin in West Virginia geboren, in response to whether I had always been in Boston, then realized as soon as I said it that I had just freaking lied - yes, I grew up in WV, but I was actually born in New Jersey. Unfortunately, I didn't have the vocabulary to fix my error, but also who the hell has to correct where they were born? My idiocy in foreign languages apparently makes me forget basic facts about myself. I was flush with linguistic victory only briefly; after realizing my heinous mistake, I went back to hand-wringing and skulking.

We waved our farewells after four hours (we were only the second people to leave - the Swiss take these gatherings as serious business, apparently), and retreated back to our apartment, pleased to have made contact after 3 months. We did break protocol by not making a second round of the table to individually say goodbye (where, apparently, one is supposed to remember all the names learned just hours before - I would have failed this test of Swiss-ness). In the end, despite the language barrier, it was a huge success. We made an effort, and I feel that people now know that I'm the American wife and should be treated gently, linguistically speaking. By going to the gathering, B and I can now lay claim to the concept of being good neighbors, and ever since, I have been greeting people with a much more confident Grüezi  in the hallways and, yes, even the waschküche. I no longer feel like a fugitive in my own apartment building, and I've even gotten a small smile from the Hausfrau.

Even better, people ate almost all my cookies. Who needs a common language when you've got baked goods?

Happy 4th of July!

Happy 4th! I hope that all my friends and family in the US are taking a well-deserved day off from lab/work/stress.

Things here have been quiet. Perhaps no more than usual. It feels like it's been quieter, but that could be because I put my part-time editing work on hold a couple weeks ago. Why? Because it was taking up just enough of my day that it made an easy excuse not to accomplish anything else. I do plan to pick it  up again after this month. Because this month (as in, July), I am trying Camp Nanowrimo - AGAIN. This time I've actually written out some sort of outline and key plot points (important because I hear that's a writerly thing to do, but also because my last attempt in April failed due to multiple impossible/out of order scenes and occurrences). I'm also working in some biology because, well, that's kind of what I know. So we'll see how it all goes. It does likely mean that I will be quiet on the blog over the next month.

I've been in Switzerland now for almost six months. Which seems crazy to me. And completely stresses me out because I should've gotten much more done. Or at least be looking into a "real" job (ok, fine, any job). I have been keeping my eye out for teaching positions at international/private schools in the area, but most of them want actual teaching credentials. Which I do not have. And the other jobs that I have seen are not biology-related, which is really the only subject I can claim to have extensive knowledge of (according to my CV, at least).

Outside of the job front, however, things feel on-schedulish/time-appropriate. My German is not comfortable, but I can now tell the difference between a dry cleaner's and a grocery store, and I can translate a surprising number of advertisements on the train and around town. To be honest, I'm still highly uncomfortable with even basic interactions, but I've become more accustomed to the discomfort and I deal with it better. I've taken to watching a solid half-hour of German news in the morning, during which I sit with translate.google.com up and just type in the news headlines on the screen. It's good for expanding my vocabulary, although I don't have much occasion to use "bankrupt," as a general rule.

My social calendar is also slowly settling. I have met a few people here that I socialize with on a semi-regular basis, which is needed for sanity. I've occasionally made my way to the local Stitch n' Bitch meetups, which are tons of fun. I've also been to a couple meetings of an English-speaking theater group here (although I didn't audition for their fall production, I'm interested in getting involved behind the scenes). Last Friday, I went to a writer's group that is hosted by the AWCZ (American Women's Club of Zurich), and it was lovely and fun, and I plan to return - although apparently my interest in "genre fiction" made me a bit of an outlier. On Monday, B and I went with one of our new friends to see the latest Superman movie (in English, with French and German subtitles - which, by the way, are SUPER distracting. I kept reading them and then missing the actual spoken dialogue. Also, movies here have intermissions. Just a tip - it doesn't mean the projector is broken. Not that I thought that! - Ok, I totally did). For the next month, we have a variety of outings scheduled at least one evening a week, which feels lovely - not too busy, but not too much hunkering down and hiding from the world.

This weekend is the Zürifäscht, a huge street fair here in Zurich that apparently happens once every three years. There are supposed to be music and street acts, food stands, and fireworks. I'm super excited to check it out, and the fireworks are right on time for July 4th, which I appreciate. Schedule/website can be found here (in German). I plan to charge my camera batteries and check it out!

Recent German experiences

I'm officially on break after three months of daily, intensive German classes, and I'm supposed to be studying on my own. Surprisingly, I actually am. I haven't yet tackled the German version of the first Harry Potter (although I have re-read the English version as a refresher, and the German book version is currently mocking me from our kitchen table), but I've been working on my vocabulary with a set of German vocab cards that my parents had in a hidden corner of their house. The cards look as if they date from the 1960s or so, but I'm assuming that the language hasn't changed that much in 50 years - and if it has, it's been the introduction of words such as "der Computer" or "<unknown article> E-Mail." Which are obviously not the words that cause me trouble.

I've taken my father's suggested approach (why are parents always right?) and, every day, I introduce 3 new cards to my "learn/know" pile. I've been pulling the cards at random, so sometimes I already know them ("tanzen" - to dance), and others are of questionable usefulness ("das Pferd" - the horse. Basic, yes, but how often do horses come up in conversation, really?). I make sure that I never pull more than one card a day that I already know. It feels slow, but it's rewarding to see the pile grow and realize that I am actually remembering the words. B often quizzes me when he gets home about what I've learned.

I've also been watching a fair amount of German television now that we have a cable box and tv set up (yes, still on the floor). Since we got back from the US, it's mainly been French Open coverage, so I've been listening to some English interviews with players, French chair umpires shouting "Merci, s'il vous plait" at the crowd in an attempt to get them to stop screaming (and lots and lots of review of the numbers 15, 30, and 40), and tons of German commentators. I've only picked up a few new words ("versuchen" - to try), but I like that it's a lot of repetitive vocabulary, so I can find the words I know (play, to win, won, there is/are, it was, s/he had, quick, also, tomorrow, next week, other, again, to last, several numbers). Watching TV is, of course, very passive - and for that reason I usually try to avoid it - but I appreciate that aspect now. It allows me to repeat phrases or sentences, rolling them around, trying to mimic the pronunciation as well as take as long as necessary to tease apart words and understand what is being said. It's also nice to get used to hearing the language at its normal speed. It no longer seems like a hopeless, random assortment of syllables that people are mocking me with (I totally don't take not understanding a language personally. What kind of crazy person would do that?).

So, how has all this translated into the "real world"? Mixed results, of course. I stopped by a bakery with a friend last week and while she ordered, I grabbed a lemonade from the cooler. Another bakery worker asked me something and I froze, my usual cat-caught-with-paw-in-the-fish-tank look. It was not "Ist das alles?" - which I can understand - although apparently it was the same intended meaning. The bakery worker switched to English and even gave me the price in English. I resisted the urge to pettishly claim that I understand "four francs" and shamefacedly handed over my money without protest. Perhaps she was speaking Swiss German - I still am completely unable to crack this oral language, and rarely even recognize it.

However, I had a small (very small, perhaps) moment of triumph last Friday. I found myself in town and hungry around lunch time, so I went to a food stand outside of Manor. As usual, I hung back until I had decided what I wanted, steeled myself for the likely conversation that would take place, and gotten out my money (half-franc coins are exactly the same size as dimes, and I still haven't cleaned US coins out of my billfold). I stepped up and requested a frühlings-brot, and the woman asked me a question in response. I went into panic mode, felt the whites of my eyes grow, and had time to think "She can't be asking me if it's for here or take-away [a question that has tripped me up a few times at Starbucks], crap, it's been too long, say your "I don't speak German" line." And I opened my mouth to say it, when I realized I understood what she had asked me. She was asking me which type of sandwich I wanted - apparently there were two made with the same type of bread, which I hadn't realized. She had, in fact, said "Gemüse oder Camembert?" and while I had opened my mouth to confess my ignorance, I was able to switch tactics and say "Camembert, bitte!" with an inappropriately large, possibly creepy, smile. I paid for the sandwich and left without further incident. Yes, it was only three words, but it was the first time ever that I experienced an unexpected German question and actually fielded it. VICTORY! My sandwich never tasted better.

Of course, I had originally wanted the vegetable (gemüse) sandwich, not the cheese one. I chose Camembert because I simply latched onto the last word she had said.

Baby steps.

Liebster Award

So my wonderful friend Melissa over at Researching San Diego has nominated me for a Liebster award. She and I first met at my recruitment weekend for graduate school, and we immediately clicked and have kept in touch despite an almost-constant ocean between us (she spent 4 years in Paris and moved back to the States a mere 3 months before I made my way to Zurich). She's a wonderful, warm-hearted soul and her blog definitely reflects that - it tends to be positive and much less snarky than my own writing. 

I'd never heard of the Liebster award, so I poked about online and it seems to be of uncertain origin, but it is intended for blogs that have fewer than 300 followers (I officially have 1) as a way of bringing attention to other small blogs. I thought it apropos, since "liebster" is actually a German word meaning "dearest." The earliest mention I found online is at this German blog - although the limit there is fewer than 3000 followers (!). It's not so much of an award as a way of getting to know other bloggers and also telling them about yourself.

Share 11 things about yourself:

1. From the age of 6 until 2 days ago, I never had or paid for cable television. From 6 through the end of college, I didn't even have the "free" channels; my parents turned off our television on purpose (although we had an extensive collection of videos for Friday family movie night and when we were sick or doing mundane things like snapping beans), and my roommate in college never had a television. In Boston, I lived by myself and couldn't bring myself to pay so much money to watch television, although I did watch ABC, CBS, etc (and I later paid for Netflix and Hulu Plus to stream through my Xbox). If B and I ever have kids, I'd follow my parents' example.

2. I drink almost nothing but water and the occasional tea, orange juice when I am sick, or milk with cookies. I've probably been doing this for almost 8 years. I will occasionally have a ginger ale or root beer on a special occasion or as an indulgence. I don't miss other drinks, although here in Zurich you pay just as much for water as anything else, so it's no longer done out of cheapness. When I read health articles or suggestions, almost always one of the first suggestions is to cut down/out on sugary beverages, and I get unreasonably grumpy because I have totally already done that. 

3. I inherited both poor sinuses and strange eyesight from my mother. When I was younger, I had one eye that was far-sighted and one that was near-sighted. My mother recognized the squinting and headaches and took me to an eye doctor when I was 8 or so - her near/far-sightedness wasn't noticed she went for her driver's test at 16. Over the years, both eyes have continuously gotten more nearsighted, so I no longer make eye doctors re-check their diagnoses. My favorite part was for a few years in college, where I had only one contact because my far-sighted eye had reached 20/20.

4. I have a tattoo on my lower back (as in a "tramp stamp" - I enjoy the irony of this). I got it for my 25th birthday and have never regretted it, but I have also never seriously considered getting another one.

5. I have two sisters, both older. My mother also has two sisters (and one brother), as did my grandmother. Out of my sisters, I am the shortest, have the darkest hair, the only one with grey/bluish eyes (my sisters have more green/hazel), and the only one that can't roll my tongue.

6. I was probably 12 or 13 before I realized that the small coffee-colored mark on the inside of my right wrist was actually a birthmark. Until that time, I used to tell people that I didn't have one.

7. I am convinced that every person has at least one "fact" we believe that is actually incorrect. Most likely something from our childhood that we were told by our parents or siblings, accepted it without question, and have never had it challenged as an adult (examples: I had a friend - a biologist - who absolutely "knew" that humans lost 90% of their body heat through their head. When I inquired why, she said it was because her mother said it all the time - right before her mother told her to wear a hat. My dad used to say that most vitamins in an orange were actually contained in the pith - the white part - and later admitted he had no idea, it was just something his mother used to say to get him to eat the entire thing).

8. I love board games! I make my friends play them when I have birthday parties, and my family always plays several when we get together for Christmas or other gatherings. My favorite is Trivial Pursuit. I don't understand why most people aren't as enthusiastic about them as I am. 

9. Usually, I have no regional American accent, but I lapse into a West Virginian one when I am very tired or angry. Or when I visit any part of the Appalachians. 

10. I regret not keeping in touch better with many, many people from college - my classmates are truly amazing women. I am glad that I have Facebook so that I can still see all the wonderful paths their lives have taken. This month will be our 10-year reunion (I'm missing it), and I will definitely prioritize making our 15-year one.

Mount Holyoke College

11. I find it ironic that, starting in middle school through beyond college, I spent years studying French and trying to become functional in it, even living in France for 8 months between a job and entering graduate school. However, I ended up marrying a Spanish-speaking man and living in a German-speaking city. There's probably a moral in there somewhere, but I don't know what it is.

Answers to the 11 questions I was given:

1. What is your go-to, most comforting meal? Definitely my mother's recipe for hamburger stroganoff. It is a family favorite and I'm still convinced that she hasn't fully revealed how she does it, since my attempts to recreate it are always just slightly off. 

2. Top 5 destinations you hope to travel to some day? I would never turn down a trip any where, any time. In no particular order, here are some destinations that have been on my mind recently: Cinque Terre in Italy, Angkor Wat, Japan, New Zealand, and Machu Picchu. (Are you reading this, B?) 

3. Top 5 places you have already visited? I feel like I haven't actually gone that many places, which is depressing (and needs to change now that I am in the middle of Europe!). Again, in no particular order: Paris, St. Malo (a small walled French town in Bretagne), Quebec, Costa Rica, and White Pine, Tennessee. The last one may not seem exotic - and it certainly won't make any travel guides. But growing up, my family would make the drive to White Pine at least twice a year to stay at my grandparents' house. We usually stayed for at least a week, and it was always a huge gathering of family - cousins, aunts, uncles, random peoples. Typically we went down in July for a large family clan reunion ("Meet your sixth cousin twice removed!") and Thanksgiving, a more "intimate" gathering of around 15-20 people. The house was always bustling, and my cousins and I always made it our goal to avoid the adult relatives as much as humanly possible by hiding in the basement. Now that my grandparents are gone, I don't have much reason to return to that area of the US, although I would like to show it to B at some point.

4. What song takes you back to your senior year in high school like it was yesterday? I'm afraid I don't have many strong memories associated with my senior year of high school - I was very, very eager to leave West Virginia behind. I did enjoy Baz Luhrmann's Class of '99: Wear Sunscreen, since I was in the high school graduation class of '99 (and my high school had 99 graduates, actually). However, during the summers between high school, I worked at a Girl Scout camp near Knoxville, Tennessee, and I have many memories of driving around in a camp van with other counselors singing "Bitch" by Meredith Brooks at the top of our lungs.

5. What was your first car? Technically I have had only one car with its license in my name, but the first car that I was "in charge of" was an '89 white Subaru that an older sister and I shared (we went to college within 15 minutes of each other). The car was inherited from my aunt, and my sister named her "Sweetie" because we had to encourage her to go places - particularly up hills. She couldn't go above 72 mph without significant shaking.

6. Coffee or tea? Definitely tea. Usually herbal. I don't drink caffeine in any form very often, and the only way I will drink coffee is if it has been seriously sugared and milked up beyond recognition.

7. What is your favorite thing to cook? Can I only choose one? Generally, I would say cookies. I love to bake lots of things, but cookies are usually quick and not very labor intensive (vs., say, cupcakes, which are also delicious but a bit messier). And so tasty.

8. Favorite thing about blogging? I enjoy telling stories and entertaining. I also love my family and friends. This blog is like writing dozens of emails at a time to let everybody back home know what I'm up to and how I'm feeling. I am really, really horrible at keeping in touch with people, so I love that I've finally found a way to do it, although I'm afraid it is a bit impersonal. (A close second: I find that this blog has worked well as a personal motivator, either to try things that otherwise I would be nervous about, or just as a reminder to get up and out of the house.)

9. Three pieces of advice you would give younger you? 1) Getting a PhD is a worthy goal, but it should be considered a means to an end - reflect on what you want your end to be. 2) Your parents always told you that you'd eventually find like-minded people and be happy - and they were totally right. Also, being an adult doesn't automatically mean that you are as wise as your parents - there are stupid adults out there. 3)  Take more chances. Try not to be so afraid - it's a lifelong struggle, but start now.

10. What would be your perfect date? I think this answer would probably change hourly, depending on my mood. But right now, I would say a tasty meal that I don't have to make or clean up, then fancy clothes and going out - probably to the ballet - then off to a restaurant for dessert (somehow involving chocolate and berries, please), then coming home, switching to some yoga pants, and spend a couple hours curled up on the couch playing Xbox games with B (cooperative ones, not ones where he beats my ass).

11. Could you recommend 2 books that moved you (any genre)? I have many books that I adore or would recommend. But (to me) books that moved me suggest books that had an impact, changed my outlook, ones that stayed with me after I put it down. I would say Little Bee, by Chris Cleave. Along the same lines (in terms of a book that has its moments of triumph but not necessarily a "happy ending") would be Girl in Translation by Jean Kwok. On the other end of the spectrum would be The $64 Tomato: How One Man Nearly Lost His Sanity, Spent a Fortune, and Endured an Existential Crisis in the Quest for the Perfect Garden by William Alexander. It's non-fiction and really very funny - one could compare it to Bill Bryson. It moved me because I read it at a time I was feeling very disenchanted with my life, and it reminded me of the garden my family had growing up. It inspired me to start my balcony garden in Boston last year, and that in turn caused me to start baking/cooking more, and then I picked up crocheting again....basically, I blame that book for the spiral that turned me into a wannabe '50s housewife. And so far it's a lot of fun :)

Nominate other bloggers:

1. No Goat's Going to Lick That Off

2. Dubious Hausfrau

3. Gegenwart Bewältigung

(Lesson: I need to interact with more bloggers)

11 questions for others to answer:

1. What is your dream home and where would it be?

2. Favorite thing about blogging?

3. What are your top three most-visited websites?

4. Name a book you would recommend.

5. Favorite vacation you've taken?

6. Any plans for the summer?

7. What's the best way to spent a Sunday?

8. What gives you a sense of accomplishment?

9. Favorite Olympic sport to watch?

10. What is your go-to meal to make (either for yourself or company)?

11. What's your favorite season?

Thanks again to Melissa for the nomination, and thanks for anyone who made it through this entire post!

Settling in

So I am totally enraptured with our new apartment. Which feels great - I was a wee concerned that I would like it only in comparison to B's studio, and I'd start bugging B to move in another year or two (which is totally normal in Boston - many people I knew there, myself included, often moved every few years, but here, it's definitely not done. People find a place and hunker down).

But instead, I find that each time I tackle something, it becomes more awesome. I am currently baking cookies, my first attempt at baking here, and it's wonderful. The oven preheats normally, the estimated cooking times in recipes are accurate, and even though the kitchen is small, it's set up smartly and it's very easy to make things without lots of running around.

Today is a holiday (Labor Day), so B is home and we did a fair amount of sorting this morning and putting what we can away. The spare room is currently our holding space, so there are still a good dozen boxes and bags in there, but I felt ready enough that I just brought up 2 suitcases from downstairs to open and explore (I unzipped the first one and decided to bake the cookies instead, so maybe I wasn't totally ready).

Yesterday B took off work (his company grants a day off for moving locally, which sounds like a very reasonable policy) and we headed to Ikea. While I like to think that I am an adult and past buying furniture at Ikea, it turns out I'm totally not. There are a few pieces I am holding out for in terms of quality (mainly a couch and a decent mattress), but we ended up with quite a long list of items that we'll order for home delivery. However, we won't receive them until we come back from US in mid/late May, so there's only a limited amount of unpacking we can currently do.

For some problems, it's been one step forward and one step back. We picked up our new TV yesterday, which B was keen on setting up - but since we don't have a TV stand, it's currently just sitting on the living room floor. We bought some curtains at Ikea yesterday, so that we could keep our blinds up. Unfortunately, all curtains here turn out to be three meters long (!), so they dragged a bit. We tied them up so they don't cover the floor, but the knot of course defeats the purpose of having them prevent people from seeing inside. I am trying to convince B that this is a sign that I need a sewing machine.

I spent a couple hours outside planting some seeds and plantlings today, as well as pulling some weeds from the flower beds (I HOPE they were weeds - I tried to only pull out stuff I was confident about or that appeared dead).

In the containers: strawberry plants and a pepper plant. In the beds behind, a rose bush, more strawberry plants, and many plants of uncertain assignment.

 It was perfect weather to be outside, and apparently some neighbors felt the same way. There is a German-speaking family on one side of us with a young son and daughter (I'm horrible at guessing children's ages, but I would say the son was 5 and the girl maybe 2.5?). The entire family was sitting on their patio, and the boy had a play bow and an arrow that he was shooting around. We exchanged friendly hellos, but nothing more - I am still a bit unsure what the protocol is in apartments here, but I've heard that Swiss neighbors are usually not terribly welcoming at first (fine by me - otherwise I'd would've had to give my standard "Sorry, I speak only a little German" and pulled B out of the apartment to make conversation).

In the containers: tomato plant, raspberry plants, and 2 trays of expired seed packets (we'll see if any of them sprout). Behind - another rosebush, forsythia, and more unknown plants. This summer's garden will certainly be surprising, if nothing else.

At some point, apparently the little boy's arrow went missing, as both parents spent a bit of time wandering around on the hill looking for it. Later, B came out to join me on the patio, and the little boy gave us several curious looks as he re-emerged and continued the hunt. At one point while directly in front of us, he called back to his mother on their patio (I understood nothing but "Mama.....").

B turned to me and said, "He said that he thinks the strange lady next door stole his arrow."

To be fair, I wouldn't judge the boy if he thought this figure was in the business of stealing arrows. (Also, note the size of the plant I am holding in my hand. I really hope it was, in fact, a weed)

Of course, it turns out that the little boy actually said nothing of the sort. B is wonderful at straight-faced bold lies (at our wedding, he almost convinced my cousin that he used to play golf professionally), and usually I can call him. However, this time I bought it hook, line, and sinker. Point to B.

As punishment for him, I'm eating all the cookies. And they are go-ood.

Showing off our apartment (and my language skills)

Due to the events this week and my subsequent addiction to streaming the local Boston NPR station online, I've fallen behind in my Camp Nanowrimo word count goal. So now that I'm finally sitting down to write, I'm of course doing a blog post. I may have to add up word counts from this month's blog posts and add them to my story....that's not cheating, right?

As you may be aware, B and I are moving into a new apartment soon. We finally found a place after a very slow, long, painful search, and I am soooo excited to move out of the one-room place we've been squatting in for the past 3 months (yes, that is one-room, not one-bedroom). However, since our search was taking so long, we didn't want to give notice to move out of this cell (I mean palace) until we had another place and date confirmed.

And of course in order to give notice in Switzerland, you have to send a letter to the rental agency and then sign something that the rental agency gives you and then they have to send you the forms for other people to fill out and you have to send something back to the agency again saying yes, please put an advertisement up. (When I say "you," I really mean B. I'm not on the lease so that was my official excuse to not participate in any of this process). Anyway - the whole thing takes a while. But the advertisement finally went up and B started fielding phone calls from interested parties.

We tried to set up only one viewing last Thursday, but of course people couldn't make that day, so maybe Wednesday, and then some people can't come THAT day, so maybe Friday? Basically, we ended up having three nights in a row in which people invaded and I couldn't make dinner until late (I have such a wonderful attitude about this whole thing). Then it turned out that out of at least 10 applicants, the mysterious black box at the rental agency only found one acceptable, so we had to have another viewing this Thursday (which means we really had one Wednesday AND Thursday - that's five viewings for the price of one).

For the most part, I did a great job of buzzing people into the building, shoving B at the door to answer it, and then lingering silently near our (four) computers to make sure nobody tried to steal them. I totally wasn't creepy.

Apartment viewing is fun - it's a pretty random slice of humanity that walks through the door. We got some strange ones, including a woman who cheerfully spoke Gerglish (Engman?) the entire time, even though it was obvious that neither were her native language. There was a group of three Puerto Rican girls who were REALLY excited that B spoke Spanish (3 of them, but they only took one form - B claims this is because Hispanics must always travel in groups). There were several English speakers, or at least ones that were more than happy to switch into English. Those who didn't, I let B handle.

Except twice. The first time B abandoned me to show the cellar storage to some woman who had an irrational number of questions, and my worst fear was realized - the bell rang, and I had to let someone else in. The following conversation, as best I can recall, ensued:

(Language key: G - German, F - French, E - English, italics - my thoughts)

Me: [G] Hello!

Very nice girl: [G] Hello!

Me: Please don't ask me about taking your shoes off. I never understand if people are saying OFF or ON, and I inevitably give them the wrong answer.

Me: [G] This is the kitchen. <appropriate grand gesture>

VNG: [G] Nice - something something something.

Me: noncommittal noise. <awkward pause> Crap, I should've said something. [G] Sorry, I'm learning German.

VNG: [G] something something since something?

Me: Ah, she's probably asking how long I've been learning German! [G] Since two months.

VNG: <looks very surprised>

Me: Damage control! Say something! What else could she be asking about for a length of time? [G] For [E] me. [G] My husband live since two years in the [F] apartment. [E] Crap, that's [G] French.

VNG: [F] We can speak French, if you'd like.

Me: <blank stare> No one in my entire time here has spoken French. OMG IS SHE FRENCH? She IS fashionably dressed. (Narrator's note: I get really, really self-conscious about my French in front of French people who are fluent in other languages. So...most French people). [F] Yes, ok! [G] This is the bathroom. WTF was that? Didn't we just agree to switch to French? How the hell do you say bathroom in French? I'm pretty sure I knew it five minutes ago.

VNG: <cautious look>

Me: Uhhh...PANIC PANIC PICK A LANGUAGE. Where the hell is Bruno? [G] My husband is coming. He is in the [E] basement. [G] There is a washing machine and cellar.

VNG: [G] something washing something?

Me: Ok, definitely asking about the washing. [G] At the end of month is there 10 days free. On 11th and 12th have we washing. Two days for every [F] apartment.

VNG: [G] ..apartment. <sympathetic smile>

Me: Oh hell. How many questions can that other woman POSSIBLY have? I need a panic button. [G] My husband is coming. He explain better. Here is the room. That is the balcony. <sneak to door and check it to see if B is coming back up the stairs>

VNG: [G] something with without furniture something?

Me: [G] without <checks door again> If B comes back and I've given away our first born child, it's totally his fault.

VNG: [G] something something something?

Me: Uhhhhh.... [E] Uhhhhhhh....

<door creaks open>

Me: <runs to door and grips B's arm in inappropriate desperation> [E] Talk to this woman!

B: [G] chit chat chit chat

VNG: [G] chit chat chit chat.

B: [E] She wants to know if we'd be willing to sell any of our stuff.

Me: [E] If it's up to me, she can have all of it.

VNG: <laughs> [E] I just moved here, so I have nothing.

Me: ......Did she just understand me AND REPLY IN ENGLISH?

....Yep. So that's what happened. Turned out the girl was actually from Italy and perfectly nice....and, of course, spoke English (that brings her language total to four, in case any one is keeping track. I have jealousy issues).

Apartment viewing is fun. More stories later!

Deutsch vs Francais

Remember that post last week where I commented it was spring? Yeah, I was wrong.

And we've had steady (though not heavy) snow all day, so there's another good inch by now.

The above picture is the view outside our window this morning. Apparently, I am a not a groundhog (how did Punksataw Punxsutawney - yep, had to google that spelling - Phil do this year, by the way? Did he successfully predict the half-dozen spring snowstorms on the east coast?).

Meanwhile, I am still attending daily German classes - I'm currently just over halfway through my second month. Unfortunately, any German I retain appears to come at the cost of my poor long-disused French skills. When I first started class, I would think "Ah! I totally know how to say this in French, why can't people here just speak another of this country's official languages? Then I could totally communicate." Now, however, my thought process is more akin to "Oh, in French that's...wait, why can't I remember how to say this? Did I ever even know it? Is this word French or German? What's happening to me?!" It's as if my brain only has room for one foreign language, and it's performing a slow, steady 1:1 replacement of French with German.

Unfortunately, some French words insist on sticking around, particularly prepositions and conjunctions. So I often pepper my stuttered German sentences with mais ["but"], ou ["or"], or sans ["without" - not helped by the fact that this is also used in English]. Some German prepositions make sense but most rarely line up with the ones we use in English (I hang out with my friends, but German uses bei, - however, I go to class by tram, while in German I go mit the tram). To make it more confusing, the French prepositions often paralleled English, so it was never a part of speech that caused particular problems for me previously. And, of course, I am not even starting on the dativ or akkusativ articles for nouns in a prepositional phrase. That's a whole other post (or just several long, inconclusive rants).

As far as I can tell in German, prepositions are idiomatic usage - thus straight memorization. At the beginning, I tried to draw parallels ("Hmm, so bei is by, um is at, and am is in." Yeah, wrong. One of my favorites - auf is "on"). I've since abandoned that approach.

The Australian girl in class (the only other native English speaker than myself) went to Paris this past weekend and missed class on Monday. The teacher inquired as to where she was, and I replied with a garbled "Elle - sie - ist in Paris avec - mit - ....ihr Freund." I then gave an even more incomprehensible attempt in German - my goal sentence was "She went to France" (we learned the past tense this week). I did not succeed in saying that, although I did manage to remember the German name for France (Frankreich, in case you need to know). I think I said something akin to "You go towards France went [incorrect past participle]." Does he really expect me to be able to discuss France or French topics in German? My poor brain is melting. In related news, I've abandoned the Swiss habit of saying Merci as a way of thanking people and just insist on using Danke. If I'm going to go German, I'm committing, dammit.

As for functionality in German, it's been a mixed bag over the past few weeks.

I successfully understood when a cashier asked me if I wanted a bag (Ja, bitte), but later that same day failed to comprehend when another cashier asked me if I wanted my receipt for a croissant purchase (unrelated tangent: what on earth is the difference between a "croissant francais" and a "gipfeli"? They appear the exact same, but have different prices). I answered Nein, despite failing to understand (interactions are still at least 60% guesswork for me), since I figured I had everything I needed, so whatever she was offering, I could safely decline. This led to an awkward moment where I held out my hand for the change and kept hovering it there as she ripped off the receipt and...turned to put it in the trash. Light bulb moment for me, as I realized what I had just refused, but awkward, as she turned around to see my outstretched hand waiting for the item that five seconds previously I had refused. Oops. Hard to make it look smooth, so I left.

Moving date!!

The biggest news in the past week is that B and I found an apartment! We actually received simultaneous offers on 2 places (cover letters apparently do make a difference), and after some agonizing, we picked one. It's large-ish (for Zurich) and a few stops on the regional train outside the main city. But it has a shopping complex (ie, groceries) right across the street, a bus stop 2 minutes away, and even a sport facility nearby - as well as parking places for rent should we ever decide to get a car. By train, it's less than twenty minutes from the city center, although it is a good 45 minutes away from the airport (that's ok, I promise I'll still meet visitors there). I am SO excited - our move in date is May 1st, so that gives us some time to pack up and also show the current apartment (after a thorough spring cleaning) - since we are moving without three months' notice, we need to find at least two "suitable" candidates for the apartment to offer to the company in order for B to be released from the current lease. I spent all evening yesterday on Pinterest looking at color schemes and decorating and gardening ideas.

A friend asked me last week if we had Kinder Surprises in Switzerland. We do, although they are rather lost in the copious Lindt displays. This was one of three in a small grocery store. Perhaps a stereotype, but it does appear that the Swiss are serious about their chocolate.

My second month of German class started this week. So far the grammar continues to make sense, but I am still horrible at pluralizing nouns and I haven't been studying my vocabulary enough, so I often find myself conjugating verbs that I have no idea what they mean (always an interesting venture when they require additional verbs or direct objects, eg "What do you do when you are hungry?" "When I am hungry, I dance." - No?). It was an epiphany that I was perhaps a tad slow to reach - it took me three weeks to realize that since there is no common language, we are never expected or asked to translate anything. The instructor tries to ensure that we understand a word when it is first introduced, but beyond that, we're on our own. I've made some flash cards, but I desperately need to make more. Typically in reading texts, I can eventually come up with the meaning, but definitely not fast enough for oral exercises.

I've started staying after class to work on homework - the school has a small cafeteria area that is quiet and has fewer distractions than home. Last week, my instructor came in to visit the vending machine and saw me there. He first said something complimentary (yay! Ok, he probably would've said it to any student - something along the lines of Good job with German), and then asked if I was staying for the movie showing that evening. The school was showing "Friends with Benefits" (yes, the one with Justin Timberlake and Mila Kunis, a rather odd choice for a German school largely populated with native Spanish speakers).

"Nein, ich habe ein Besichtigung." [No, I have an apartment viewing - and yes, I was guessing on the gender of "Besichtigung," since I couldn't ever recall learning it. And yes, I garbled the pronunciation and had to try it a few times. But I got it out eventually.]

"Ah! Wo?" (Where?)

I gave him the street name and he shook his head. I was pretty pleased with myself that I had understood his question and managed to come up with an almost-complete answer, so I wasn't concentrating enough on my next attempt.

"Die Wohnung ist....<painful pause> nachts....mein Mann <another painful pause>...arbeitet." I was a deep red at this point and gave up, waving my hand arbitrarily in the air, as if to give what I said some logical context. (What I meant to say was that the place was next to [nächste] where my husband works. What I actually said was "The apartment is.....night....my husband works." Did I mention that umlauts (¨) not only change pronunciation but also entire meanings of words? Languages are tricky beasts.)

"Ah...ok." He left.

I heard him in the cafetera again yesterday, but I kept my eyes firmly focused on my work. I think we were both grateful for that.

First neighbor encounter

Yesterday morning, on my way out, I ran into one of B's neighbors for the first time. Cute little lady with white hair and a nice smile. She was bidding farewell to a few visitors (possibly adult children?) as I fumbled with our apartment lock. I smiled brightly and said "Gruezi!"- the catchall greeting in Swiss German (replacing Guten tag, etc),  although I do occasionally hear Guten abend ("Good evening") here. She smiled and replied in kind, and I started to head down the stairs, pleased with myself that I was such a friendly, if rather mute, person.

But then she started talking to me and I turned back slowly, my eyes wide.

I used my one good German phrase - I'm sorry, I don't speak any German - with an accompanying apologetic smile. I use this a lot, to try to get across the point that I know I am in their country and I really should speak their language but well.... I don't. Not yet, anyway. (How does one say "I am starting class on Monday, please talk to me slowly in a couple weeks"?)

"Ah!" She nodded "What do you speak?" (Internally: "Score! I understood that!")

"English," I replied, adding hopefully, "ou francais?" My French is rusty but still functional, and it makes me feel better to offer another option. Unfortunately, nobody in Zurich has ever taken me up on it.

She gestured to the people who had just gone downstairs in mild regret. I sighed and performed an apologetic shrug (hopefully translated as "Ah, sorry - but what can you do?"), but she wasn't done yet. She started rattling off German - pronouncing it slowly and clearly, as if perhaps I was just a little slow. 

At one point she gestured back towards my door. I thought perhaps she wondered if B was home. "He's...at work." I replied, realizing that I have no idea how to say "work" or "job" in German, I had no idea if she was even asking me that, and to top it off, she had no idea what I was saying - I was doing the exact same thing to her she was doing to me.

 I caught one word, washing. "Ah yah, washing!" I nodded. Seemingly encouraged, she started again, and this time I caught four words - the washing dates that we are assigned each month (2 days per apartment). She said both our dates and her dates and several unknown verbs that appeared to end in a question. I nodded hesitantly and she seemed satisfied. I made a mental note to text B and have him talk to her, to figure out what I had just agreed to. She then sent me off with a merry wave and more German, and I realized I couldn't remember how to say "Have a nice day" or "See you later." All my transactions have been purchases at this point, so I always ended with "Thank you."

Let's just say, I'm looking forward to starting classes on Monday, and I have quite a bit of motivation for studying. Especially since we may not be able to do any laundry this month. 

Do they have laundromats in Zurich?